June 8, 2010

Religiosity

Posted in Uncategorized tagged at 2:31 pm by Amy

One of the big topics I plan on dealing with and discussing at length is the subject of religion.

If the title of my blog didn’t suggest, Garry and I are Pagan. We each follow different paths (think Protestant and Baptist being different paths of Christianity) and we have found the common links between the two and are able to have a very spiritual connection with each other and with other members of the Pagan community we belong to.

One of the biggest obstacles for us is having a Pagan wedding. My family (at least most of it) comprises of very devout Christians. While my mother and some of my cousins are completely fine (as in “if it works for you then that’s cool with me”) with Garry and I having a Pagan wedding, I have a feeling that there are people in my family (and possibly Garry’s) who might get upset that we are going that route.

As of now, it’s our decision to not mention in the invitation or anything that it is a Pagan wedding. First and foremost, it’s a wedding. We’re hoping that my family will be so full of joy and happiness that they won’t even notice (although that might be hard) or that they’ll realize what’s going on and say “wow, that’s not really as scary/awful as we thought it would be” and not give it a second thought. Maybe it’s because when looking at the ceremony (at least what we’ve written so far) I can’t find anything in it that could be considered offensive or distasteful for any family gathering.

We don’t plan on holding back – ie we’re not having a “secular” wedding so we don’t offend any family members – because out of everything that we’re compromising on for this event, the one thing that we do not have to pay for are the words in the ceremony – which thankfully – are the most important part. Think about it – would you ask your family member to carry out a momentous event in their life in a secular (or even a different religious) way if they had a very strong spiritual background in a different religion just so you would be comfortable? Of course not! So I’m hoping they won’t ask that of me.

My mother will probably take a few minutes when the invitations come out to talk to a few family members privately who may or may not cause a scene or say something hurtful. Sadly, there are a few people in my family who come to mind. I tend to be very defensive and emotional when people discriminate against me or those I love because of our path so absobring that will make life easier, at least for me. I’d hate to ruin a relationship in our family because of our spirituality.

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